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How to Heal from a Toxic Relationship

Finding peace and balance after a toxic relationship can be a challenge, but the right mindset can help.

Here’s how to heal from a toxic relationship.

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How to Heal from a Toxic Relationship

You have finally broken free from a toxic relationship.

You no longer feel the pressure to put the needs of your partner before your own. You are not being told what to do, being manipulated, or controlled.

You may find yourself wondering how you are going to heal from the unhealthy behaviors involved in your prior relationship.

You are not alone

There are women all around the world trying to leave a toxic relationship right this moment. It is not easy. Statistics show it can take some women up to seven tries before they are able to cut ties for good with their abusive partner.

Because your self-esteem has been affected, it can become difficult to choose a better life. You did it, and now it is time to properly heal so you can begin living your best new life.

There are specific things you can do to help yourself heal from the negativity of your past relationship. Committing to such strategies is the first step, and sometimes the hardest because many do not feel they deserve to heal.

This is false, however. You deserve everything good in life and taking steps to heal from a toxic relationship will only improve your confidence and well-being.

Below are activities many women have found success with in their journey of healing.

Isolate and Integrate

You want to isolate yourself from the partner who treated you poorly. Cut all ties. This means blocking him on all social media accounts, blocking his or her number from your cell phone, blocking emails and even letters you may receive in the mail.

As you may know already, any type of contact with your ex can trigger old feelings and make it harder to say goodbye and move forward.

While you isolate from your former partner, you should also integrate yourself into positive social groups. Positive groups include those who offer you support, ask you to participate in harmless activities, and respect your needs.

The key is to not sit at home all by yourself. This can lead to negative thinking, which can lead to negative actions.

Define Your Next Relationship

Yes, there will be another relationship even if you do not think so at this time. You have many great qualities to offer someone. That someone needs to be a person who will recognize and appreciate your qualities.

If you are thinking there is a specific time period where you should stay single, you are wrong. You have done your time and you can reward yourself by getting back into the dating scene.

The one thing you must do before accepting a date with someone new is to define what you want and need in your next relationship. These characteristics should be completely different from the relationship you just left.

Make a list, on paper, of the many traits you are seeking in your next partner. Be specific and be positive. Also make a list of how they should treat you.

Boundaries are something you do not want to struggle with in your next relationship. It will not take you long to discover if the next person you date is a keeper because you will have prepared ahead of time. If they do not meet the requirements you listed, move on.


You must get physically and mentally healthy. If you do not take care of yourself, you will not have much to offer someone new.

Self-care involves getting involved in positive activities that leave you feeling satisfied and happy. To work on your mental health, begin practicing yoga and meditation. Focus on how your mind connects to your body and your spirit.

To focus on your physical health, pay attention to what your body is telling you and seek help from your doctor to resolve any problems.

One of the best strategies for self-care is to meet with a relationship therapist.

Seek Professional Help

Licensed therapists who specialize in relationships, such as a Marriage and Family therapist, or a specialist in co-dependency issues is best. They have extensive education and experience and can offer you valuable advice.

Plus, research has shown there are many advantages to working with a mental health professional when healing from a toxic relationship.

In addition to therapy, you can join a support group, which are comprised of peers facing the same difficulties as you. You will be able to share in your experiences and recovery tips.

Related: What to Look for in a Therapist

Practice Forgiveness

This may seem like an impossible task right now. It is understandable that after being hurt for so long, the last thing you want to do is forgive. Forgiveness is much more for your benefit than it is for the person who was abusive.

Forgiveness offers you freedom. It does not mean you are okay with how you were treated. It does not mean you forget how you were treated. What it does mean is that you are letting go of the pain for you to move forward.

It is not necessary for you to contact your former partner to tell them of your forgiveness. You should not have any contact with them, as mentioned before.

Forgiveness is an internal process that may not happen over night but can truly benefit your recovery once you are able to reach that point of healing.

Recognize and Reward Yourself

The bravery you have shown in leaving an unhealthy relationship should be rewarded. Thank yourself, treat yourself and do all things good for yourself.

Keep a daily journal of gratitude, leave yourself positive affirmations on post-it notes around your house, take yourself on vacation, and find other ways to continue the process of changing your self-assessments from negative to positive.


In conclusion, you can heal from a toxic relationship and it does not have to be a long, hard journey.

Seek help from a professional who can walk with you through each step to ensure you reach the better life you deserve.  You deserve it!