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7 Ways to Love Yourself

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You are busy. You fix breakfast, go to work most of the day and run errands. You get home only to fix supper, complete chores and prepare for the next day. In between all of that you take care of family and friends. So, when do you make time for yourself? How do you find the time to love yourself?

If you are like many, taking time for yourself is last on your list of priorities. You are probably feeling rundown and unappreciated. It is as if everyone thinks you are a super hero, like you can handle anything that comes your way.

While this should be flattering, it is not. In fact, it just makes you feel even more overwhelmed because you do not want to disappoint those who depend on you.

You are not alone.

Learning to love yourself can help you overcome these negative feelings. It can also eliminate your need to please everyone else even if it means your needs, or theirs, are not met.

Loving yourself does not mean you stop helping others. It simply means you are taking care of yourself the right way so that you can continue to help others in a healthier way.

Below are 7 ways you can love yourself.

Be Aware of Your Feelings

Take time to assess your emotions. Getting in touch with your feelings can help you fix issues you may be having in other areas of your life.

Many times, we find it easier to suppress emotions rather than dealing with them. You are busy and you think it is better to push your feelings aside so you will not fall behind in your personal and professional obligations.

What you may not realize is that suppressing your emotions can lead to physical illnesses. The emotions will exit your body somehow. If your emotions do not exit your body through proper methods, they will through physical ailments. Therefore, it is important to take the time to feel your emotions when you have them.

Take Care of Your Physical Health

Just as you may not take the time to address your feelings, you may not be taking time to fix physical problems either. Whether your physical health is suffering due to emotions or injuries, you must give your health the attention it deserves.

When you ignore physical health problems, they only get worse. Then, you end up spending even more time out of commission resolving your physical issues. You could become behind on work and personal duties.

Addressing physical health issues makes it easier for you to keep up with your demanding schedule, which also needs attention when trying to love yourself.

Manage Your Time

Without proper time management, you start to feel like you spend all your time working but with little progress being made. You feel disorganized and overwhelmed.

Managing your time gives you structure and helps you see if you are on track or not.

Time management includes getting the right amount of sleep. Using a calendar can help you stay organized, which lessens stress. It can also teach you to delegate duties to others who are capable, giving you time for more important tasks.

Managing your time can give you a set start time and a set end time to your work day. Then you can devote much needed time to the ones you love and the ones who love you.

Receive Love

There are people in your life who love you. They deeply love you and they want to make you feel loved. All you must do is receive their love. Yes, sometimes receiving love is harder than giving it. We may not feel like we deserve the love of others.

You do. Receiving love is just as important as giving love. It shows others that you trust them enough to let your guard down. It shows that you do not have any fears of losing them. Believe it or not, it shows them you love them too.

The best way you can show others how much you love them, is to allow them to love you back.

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Don’t Compare Yourself to Others

The grass is not always greener on the other side. Avoid spending time comparing your life to someone else’s. Even though they may look like they have it all together and that they live the perfect life, they do not.

There are several ways you can stop comparing yourself to those who look like they have it all. When you catch yourself thinking or wishing you are as good as someone else, stop that thought. Replace those thoughts with positive thoughts.

Focus more on your strengths and all the blessings you already have in your life. You have many strengths. Remind yourself of your assets each time you start to feel inferior. Retrain your brain to stop negative thoughts and replace them with positive thoughts.

Stop People Pleasing

Most people want others to like them. We want to please others. This leads you to say, “Yes”, a lot. You say yes to fundraisers, parties, school events, and many other volunteer opportunities. You do not want to say, “Yes”, but you do so in fear of making someone mad.

All your “yes” responses cut into the time you need to be spending with your family and friends, the ones who really matter in your life.

Your new answer to everyone wanting to invade your time can be, “I’m sorry, my family needs me.” Or, “I’m already committed to too many activities this year.” You can also just say, “No”.

Will you please everyone? No. Does it matter? No.

Ask for Help

You cannot do it all alone. Loving yourself means asking for help. By asking for help, you are not admitting you are weak. Just the opposite is true. Asking for help means you have the strength and the expertise to know when you cannot do it alone.

You can ask for help in completing professional and personal tasks. You can also ask for help with your emotional well-being.

Seeking help from professionals who can teach you time management, how to say no and how to receive love is a gift you can give to yourself. Professional counselors can help you change the way you think, feel and act.

Counselors are a wonderful way to learn the many techniques you can implement in your journey to loving yourself. You are good enough, you are smart enough and you are loved, by yourself and others. Enjoy it.


Chris Massman is a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist. Chris' training includes Family Systems Theory along with numerous other theories. She believes therapy is an art and chooses the theory she feels will most benefit the individual sitting in front of her. Her specialty lies is in the field of Chemical Dependency and Addictions. Chris is currently seeing individuals, couples and families. Chris is a Clinical member of the California Association of Marriage and Family Therapists as well as the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapists. Chris has two locations including Tarzana and Agoura Hills, CA.